Nobody listens
to haikus about fast food
like they used to do.

Today Chipotle
For the first time ever.
I'm not quite dead yet.

-Dan F., who followed this poem up with:

Although I have a
ringing in my ear, and my
jaw feels metallic.

Changed my meat today-
the beef instead of chicken.
I feel so empty.

Eye twitching for two
days straight; only stops when at
Chipotle. Harumph.

I'm angry today.
Burritos didn't fix it.
PMS, man-style?

Brought some leftovers
Ate them next to crazy guy
Wouldn't stop talking

Chipotle two days
in a row; dare I say I
could use a salad?

Been sick with the flu.
I wonder why Chipotle
won't just serve me soup.

My Official St Patrick's Day Limerick

Thanks to St. Pat to walk was a mess
I did not expect anything less
When drunks filled the streets
Faced with our defeat
To Chipotle we retreat; hell yes!

St. Patrick's Day Limerick

With St. Patrick's Day crowds I was sickened
The crowd on Fifth Ave. it did thicken.
Though we could not cross
It wasn't a loss
I still had my bowl with some chicken.

Spring begins to dawn.
Thanks be to burrito bowls!
Got me through winter.

Where everybody
knows your name; not quite, but they
do know my order.

Erica saved seats
so she didn't wait on line.
The servers freaked out.

Such a bad blogger.
Chipotle, can you ever
forgive me my sins?

Two salads this week
My stomach is quite happy
My tongue is less so

I want to go where
everybody knows my name.
You can call me Norm.

It's been six months since
I was born again in 'pote.
Was blind, now I see.

Three murders in my
hood this weekend; hope they got
a last chipotle.

My favorite meal:
Boat-loads of Chinese Dumplings.
Sorry, Chipotle.

This is a man's world.
But it wouldn't mean nuthin'
without Chipotle.

I would never call
911 on chipotle
unless I had to.

I never thought there
could be such a thing as too
much guac, but there is.

Chipotle servers
are starting to get freaked out
by our obsession.

Man with woman's mouth
always gives extra chicken.
This poem sounds gross.

This winter won't end.
I wish the groundhog had seen
burritos instead.

A day without it
is like a day without sun
except much much worse.

Up since 4 a.m.
Weird noise on my roof; wish I
lived at 'pot instead.

New York's all snowy
Body hurts from shoveling
Black beans are my balm

House Top Chef dinner
Each course simply delicious.
Still not Chipotle.

-Another fantastic submission from Donald B., after the fifth of six courses of an epic dinner.